HOW THE GRINCH TRULY STOLE CHRISTMAS

Hello Out There...This is your old friend Buff Gumby. Throughout my life The Buff One has met many wonderful and varied individuals who have become throughout the year close personal friends of The Mean Green Buff Machine. Still few come to mind or have had as many harrowing adventures as the individual I now introduce to you, Jim The Last Who...

I Hope you enjoy this Christmas Classic. Happy Holidays from the entire Gumby Family.

How The Grinch Truly Stole Christmas...

Now you've all heard the tale of how the Grinch He Stole Christmas... I'm here to tell you, go ahead and dismiss this... Dr. Suess did not get it exactly right you will see... If you want to hear the truth, you'll now hear it from me... It is all true how the Whos down in Whoville the big and the small the short and the tall liked Christmas a lot... It is also the truth that the Grinch who lived high atop Mount Crumpit definitely did not... He loathed Christmas Day, he hated it so... As the years passed on by his hate continued to grow... The year finally arrived, his hate to much to bare... He could not take Christmas for another single year... He schemed and he schemed and concocted a plan... There can't be a Christmas without the Jolly Fat Man... He sat atop Crumpit his machine gun firm in hand... The Grinch was not to bright, it wasn't much of a plan... Still he waited and wait for good Ole St. Nick... The mind of the Grinch was truly demented and sick... As he sat atop Crumpit, Santa came flying by... The Grinch simply shot him, right out of the sky... Santa fell twisted, mangle within his sleigh... Scattered about him his dead reindeer all lay... The Grinch gathered up Santa and all 8 tiny reindeer... Now this is the part you may not want to hear... The Grinch being a cannibal, he ate up St. Nick... Yet he was also homophobic, so he did not eat his dick... Then he made a nice stew out of all of the deer... I wish I could say that my story ends here... He then crept into Whoville, under cover of night... He slaughtered the Whos without much of a fight... He gathered their remains and slipped back into the night... I watched him climb Crumpit until he was clear out of sight... I alone survived to tell this tale to you... My name is Jim...I am the last Who...

To Be Continued...

HOW THE GRINCH TRULY STOLE CHRISTMAS: A WHOS REVENGE...

It's me again, Jim the last Who... Continuing my tale, for each one of you... I've already told of How The Grinch Stole Christmas you see... How I alone survived I will now tell to thee... I was always an outcast, I was banished from town... Upon me all other Whos would often look down... I was extreme, a rebel, considered a freak... Your typical Who was rather passive and meek... I did not fit in so I was sent away... Yet I knew I'd return to Whoville some day... I returned Christmas Eve just in time to see... That vile Ole Grinch as he started to flee... The carnage around me where once stood my home... I was filled in with details by my friend Johnny Gnome... I arrived far to late to help them you see... Yet I was still alive, the Grinch had not killed me... My heart filled with sorrow, disgust and dismay... I knew that I had to make that twisted Grinch pay... I was asked why bother, they were not good to me... Still my people they had been, I could not let it be... I climbed up Mount Crumpit my heart now filled with hate... The Grinch laid there sleeping, I did not hesitate... I hacked him into pieces, every single inch... Now you know the fate of that nasty Ole Grinch... Future stories I have and will convey them to you... My name is Jim, I am the last Who...

To Be Continued...